[Posted by Ted H]
New job starts tomorrow, good thing I got a shit ton of this novel written...
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[Pure Human - Reaper at Work]
"Sorry, can't sell to
you," a man in his late 50s said with his arms crossed, standing behind
the gas station counter with imagined authority. "Why not?" Blake
said plainly, feeling the pressure to replace his fast emptying pack of
cigarettes in his pocket. "I got a call about you earlier," the man
said "You're trying to buy smokes for an underage girl. Everyone in town
knows about you."
"Is there some sort of
gas station dead end in life clerk club that I don't know about?" Blake
asked "Where you guys have nothing better to do than talk about legal aged
clients and how you can kill them from nicotine withdrawal?" The clerk
chuckled to himself at Blake's little outburst, but made no indication of
compliance. "The girl is long gone!" Blake cried out "Just me
and the guy now and I got both our IDs right here!" the clerk simply shook
his head.
"This isn't funny,"
Blake said, but the clerk wasn't budging. "I'm gonna call the cops,"
he finally said, no longer finding Blake entertaining. "Do it!" Blake
screamed as he stormed out, another stolen cup of coffee underhand. "Why
does Albany hate me?" Blake yelled at John. "Technically," John
said "We're not actually in Albany. We're in a nearby suburb-"
"I don't care!"
Blake shouted as he climbed into the car.
"Are you sure more coffee
is a good idea?" John asked as he climbed into the driver's seat
"It's not like you don't have some cigarettes left still."
"I need to taper off a
little and stretch out what I have left," Blake reasoned "So I'm
increasing my caffeine intake to make up for the drop off in nicotine."
"That can't be
healthy."
"I bet the Surgeon
General would approve."
"How's your heart rate feeling
about all this?"
"Shut up and drive.
Hospital, please. Let's see if they can hook me up with some lung cancer."
"Anin's boyfriend
probably left for work by now," John said "Wanna pick her up and see
if she wants to tag along?"
"We don't pick up the
purple idiot until I find a new pack of smokes."
"Classy," Just said
as he started driving.
John drove out to a hospital.
It didn't look like what Blake had expected, but he wasn't going to judge. John
parked a block away and they walked up a back road, Blake smoking a cigarette
along the way. They ended up in back by the ER entrance where Blake stopped to
look around. "Finally, something goes my way for once," he said.
"Um..." John started by gave up "What are you talking
about?"
"There," Blake said
as he pointed near a dumpster. John shrugged. "There's a guy standing
there, look harder," Blake said. John squinted as he stared. He imagined
this being one of those magic eye games he always played as a kid; look long
enough at something and a secret image will appear. "Black hoodie, leaning
against the dumpster like it's no big deal," Blake added.
Then John saw it. He could see
a man in a black coat with the hood up casually leaning against the dumpster,
constantly checking his watch. "What in the..." John said as Blake
walked on and approached the man. "Hi!" he called as he waved. The
man looked up quick at Blake, then looked away immediately, pretending not to
notice. "I see you," Blake called "And I know you saw me see
you."
"You didn't see
shit!" the man called back "Now keep walking." John caught up to
Blake as he stopped in from of the man in the hoodie. "What is going
on?" he asked. "This is a Reaper," Blake explained as he
gestured to the man. "Fuck off," the Reaper replied. "Isn't he
missing his sickle?" John asked. "Aren't you missing you balls, you
fucking faggot?" the Reaper snapped back.
"They're not typically
nice," Blake said "Though this one is extra surly." The Reaper
looked to Blake and was about to say something offensive, but then stopped and
stared for a moment. "You're not normal," he said
"Explain." Blake shrugged "Must be the coat." The Reaper
leaned in and felt Blake's trench coat the recoiled his hand. "That
belongs to someone way above my pay grade," he said "How do you have
it, mortal?"
"Poker game," Blake
said with a smirk. The reaper made a face and stared back. "High stakes
poker game...I'm talking really high stakes," Blake added.
"Enough," the Reaper said "I've got a busy day and my
appointments are late and I don't need you two pansies getting in the way."
"Appointments?" John
asked.
"What do you think a
Reaper does?" Blake said.
"Well, what about last
night?" John asked "You think he may have reaped a mother and her
son?"
"Yeah, what about last
night?" Blake asked.
"Ugh," the Reaper
said as he rubbed his head "We don't reap everyone, idiots! Only if your
death has been prepared. More along the lines of 'They died after a lengthy
battle with cancer' and less of the unexpected deaths. If you're going to Hell,
you get reaped."
"What if you go to
Heaven?" John asked.
"Don't get me started on
that shit. Angels flying down, singing, it's a fucking ordeal."
"So," Blake asked
"If someone was violently mutilated and killed by an unknown
assailant..."
"Not my job
description," the Reaper said.
"Worth a shot."
"This is why we came
here?" John asked "To take a long shot at finding a Reaper then
asking him something he'd unlikely know anything about?"
"Hell no," Blake
said "We still need to get into that hospital."
"Good luck with
that," the Reaper said as he went back to ignoring them.
"You can help us,"
Blake said.
"What would I know about
sneaking into hospitals?"
"You do it all the time
on business. There's no easier place to operate than in a hospital."
"And even if I knew how
to get in, why would I help you two?"
"Because you're angry,
and I now know why. I know withdrawal when I see it. It's not anything hard,
you're at work and you could schedule any shoot up or snort on your off hours.
Your appointment is late as well, meaning you've been here, probably all day,
waiting for someone to make their meeting with death. I doubt you expected to
be here long, so you didn't plan ahead."
"What's your point?"
the Reaper asked.
"You're out of
cigarettes. I know that look anywhere. I've had it myself at times."
The Reaper's eyes went wide as
he let off an excited breath. "D-do you have one?" he finally asked.
Blake held one of his own up, tempting the Reaper with it. "What's your
name?" he asked.
"Clyde," the Reaper
said.
"I thought Reapers were
immortal badasses?" John asked, puzzled. "They still need to operate
in the real world," Blake said "And that comes with the usual vices.
Except, you know, no fear of dying, so they get to do as many hard drugs as
they like."
"I'll help you,"
Clyde said "Just, you know, let me bum one or two stogies."
"Wow," John
commented "Such a dick a minute ago. Now look at you. You're a little
bitch."
"And look at you,
"Clyde shot back "A minute ago you were such a faggot. And you're
still a fag now!"
"Can we ease up on the
homophobia?" Blake asked as he offered Clyde the cigarette "So how
are we getting inside and to the girl without the cops getting wise?"
"Easy," Clyde said
"But why do you want to see a girl?"
"Remember the dead mother
and son I mentioned?"
"What about em?"
"There's a daughter who
survived. I need to talk to her."
"You don't think the cops
are all over that?"
"Cops are looking for
someone...I'm looking for someTHING that did the killing."
Clyde arched his eyebrows.
"Nothing from my world, I can assure you," he said as he and Blake
lit up cigarettes "Nothing I know of to be honest." Blake nodded.
"I know," he said "We've been ruling out
anything...foreign."
"So it's some dude.
Crazy, but just some dude," Clyde reasoned.
"It just doesn't
fit," Blake said "Even so. If it is just some dude, I'm good at
solving those type of cases too." John gave a sarcastic cough as Blake and
Clyde ignored him and continued smoking. "So what makes you think it's
more than just some dude?" Clyde asked. "I found a clue," Blake
said "Something not human but also no animal I can reason in this area.
There's also the cave we found earlier."
Clyde gave an interested grunt
as he blew smoke. "Well, not so much a cave as much as a shady spot near
the lake where whatever this is had been gorging on the local wildlife,"
Blake continued "Inside were bones, droppings and claw marks. Something's
been living there a while. Couple weeks by the looks of it."
"Cool," Clyde
commented. "Anyway," Blake said "How we getting into the
hospital?"
"Like I said, easy,"
Clyde said "But it only works because Reapers are always moving, never in
the same location twice. The goal is to get as close to the intended target as
possible as they die because if they run, I have to chase them. The fun part there
is I can slip out of the physical world to chase after."
"How does this get me to
the girl?"
"I said I'd get you in.
The girl is your own problem."
They finished their cigarettes
and made their way around to the front of the hospital. Clyde led as they
casually made their way up to the front desk where a security guard was
waiting. "I'm here to see my dad," Clyde said. The security guard
barely looked up from his magazine as he asked for IDs.
"I'm so glad we left Anin
behind," Blake said as he pulled out his license. John rolled his eyes.
"So, what are you boys
doing here today?" the guard asked.
"We're here to see John
Fitzsimmons," Clyde said without missing a beat. The guard typed something
into his computer after taking the IDs. "Family only," he said.
"I am family," Clyde said "He's my father." The guard
looked at his ID again. "Clyde Rackner," he said reading the license.
"After the divorce I took moms last name after she won custody,"
Clyde said, looking like he had practiced his lie countless times. The guard
shrugged. "Whatever," he said as he printed a guest ID sticker.
"He's my dad too,"
Blake said. The guard arched an eyebrow. "Dad had an affair. Why do you
think his marriage failed?" The guard waved the notion off as he printed
another ID sticker. "What about the big guy behind you?" he asked
"Lemme guess, another affair?"
"Nah," Clyde said
"That's my brother's life partner."
"Got a problem with
that?" Blake asked as the guard quickly looked down and printed an ID
sticker for John. The three were then on their way into the hospital.
"Can't believe that worked," Blake said. "Rent-a-cops are
easy," Clyde said "They ain't calling out gay people cuz the job is
so disposable. Too awkward."
"You clearly have a hang
up with homosexuals," John told Clyde.
"Blah blah blah,"
Blake said "Onto business. Clyde, good luck reaping. John, let's go find
that girl."
"Don't be retarded,"
Clyde said "All of us need to find this Fitzsimmons dude."
"Why?" Blake asked.
"Anything funny happens,
they're gonna review security tape. We need to be on that tape making a bee
line for our 'dad' or they'll know something's up, especially if you're fucking
around a crime scene survivor."
"Ugh," Blake said as
Clyde called for an elevator "Fine. I've always wanted to see a reaping
anyway. Do you use a sickle?"
"Don't get me started on
that shit," Clyde said as the elevator arrived "Every Reaper is
different. The most popular and well known tool is a scythe, but not everyone
has to use one."
"What's yours?"
Clyde patted his side pocket
and smiled. "I like to get real close and personal," he said "I
always shank a bitch when I reap them."
"Comforting," Blake
said as they walked into the elevator and Clyde chose the floor.
"Alright," Clyde
said as they rode up alone "Try to keep fucking quiet while I do my thing.
I'm not used to an audience so make like the background and stay out of the
way."
"How long you been doing
this?" Blake asked. "Long fucking time," Clyde said while
watching the ascending numbers on the screen. John had no interest in Clyde and
kept himself occupied with his cell phone.
"Reap anyone
important?"
"Nah, important people
tend to bite it at unexpected times. I know a guy who knows a guy who reaped a
pope once."
"Popes get reaped? Which
one? I figure it's straight to Heaven for them."
"Nah, I dunno who. So
long ago. The guy who reaped him doesn't shut up about it though."
The elevator arrived at their
floor and they made their way down the hall to the Intensive Care Unit. At one
end were a couple police posted where the girl was being kept. Clyde led them
down the other end where his target was dying. There was a glass sliding door
with the lights out inside. In the bed was a man covered with a blanket up to
his neck with wires coming out, connecting to a monitor. His breaths were slow
but steady, his blanket over his chest rising up with some difficulty before
constantly falling back down immediately.
"Remember, I'm at
work," Clyde said before he slid the door open and everyone stepped
inside. Blake and John remained in the corner by the door as Clyde approached
the bed. "John Fitzsimmons," he announced in a low voice "You
have lived a wicked life and have been forsaken by all higher powers. Your time
has come and your fate decided."
"I think I know why
everyone always runs from you," John said, the light of his cell phone
brightening up the otherwise dark corner he and Blake occupied. "Shut
up," Clyde said through gritted teeth. "Not gonna lie," Blake
added "He don't seem like he's about to kick the bucket."
"You have no idea what
you're talking about," Clyde said.
"He's got a nice heart
rate going," Blake said "Crappy, sure, but it's steady. I mean, if he
suddenly starts rallying, then I think he's in trouble. Right now his heart
seems to be in a holding pattern before death."
"You don't know the first
thing about dying people."
"Neither do you,
apparently," John quipped.
"You guys can wait
outside now," Clyde said. John, not needing more of an invitation than
that, started for the door and opened it. "But I kinda wanna see
this," Blake said. "Don't forget, we're at work, too," John
reminded him, causing Blake to unwillingly drag himself out of the room.
"That guy's an ass,"
John said when they closed the door. "You say the same thing about
me," Blake said with a grin. "You're an ass who at least makes an
effort," John replied as they started down the hall towards where the girl
was "Clyde is just insufferable."
"He's a Reaper,"
Blake said "They ain't suppose to be pleasant."
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February 21, 2016
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