[Posted by Ted H]
Well, things have been hectic for me lately. Haven't had a chance to keep watching Diarrhea of the Dead to critique....not gonna complain too much, but the whole project is currently hanging over my head...and I hate that...
I'm splitting this next part into 2, not JUST because I'm lazy like that, but there comes a sudden tone shift between cheeky fun and holy shit that I feel is better when separated...Sue me...
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[Pure Human - Dog Hunt]
John drove down to the house and
they began their search for the missing dog, driving up and down every nearby
block until the tracker sounded. Then they got out and continued their search
on foot. "How many people like Lena are there?" John asked. Blake
shrugged. "I know there are a lot," he said "But it's spread out
all over the world. I may have exaggerated a little earlier when I said there's
an army of people out there."
"What do you think you
have to do to be chosen by God for that?"
"Lead a boring
life," Blake said as he followed where the tracker was indicating. The sun
had been setting and darkness was beginning to cover the area. John had his
flashlight but didn't feel the need to use it yet. "This tracker is crap,"
Blake said raising the tracker in the air to see if a better indicator could be
given.
"Do you even know how to
use that?" John asked as Blake tossed it to him. "Just follow the
beeps," John explained as Blake walked to the middle of the road. Street
lights lit up and Blake looked about. "Forget the dog," he said
"Where would you hide if you were a monster?"
"Or a dog just out and
about town," John added.
"Fine," Blake said
"A monster or a dog, or a monster with a dog or a dog chasing after a
monster. Either way, where would you go to avoid being found or messed
with?"
"A dark hole," John
said "But there was nothing by the lake."
"Must've ran out of food,
hence why it ventured out into the world. Couldn't have gone far," Blake
said as he looked from house to house. Inside most were lights on and activity.
Some houses on the block were dark and quiet. "Probably found another
house?" he suggested. Before John could answer, Blake approached the
nearest dark house. John followed while looking to the tracker.
"Anything? "Blake
asked. John shook his head. "You sure about this?" he asked as Blake
jogged down the street to where he saw another dark house. He went through the
lawn and up to a window to peer inside. John came up behind him and was about
to say something when he noticed the tracker was indicating they were close to
the dog. "Interesting," he said as Blake ran over to the front door,
but it was locked. He knocked on the door and rang the doorbell but no one
answered.
"We need to get
inside," Blake announced.
"Yes, let's be
criminals," John said "Maybe some family found the dog and took it
in."
"Sure, maybe that,"
Blake said "OR, what we're looking for is inside and we can actually make
some headway in this case."
John stayed silent a moment
before he relented. "Fine," he said "I guess it isn't a real
case for us if the police don't try to arrest you at some point." Blake
smiled. "That's the spirit!" he said "So, how do we get
in?"
"Just pick the
lock," John said. Blake gave him a shocked look. "Sure, but is this
how the creature got in?"
"Do we really need to
play the guessing game?" John asked "Can't we just go in and do this
fast?"
"We're investigators, not
cops," Blake said "We do it the fun way or we don't bother."
"I didn't know there was
room for the fun way when we're trying to find whatever slaughtered a
family," John said as Blake started to walk around the outside of the
house. At this point the sun had set beyond the horizon and John turned on his
flashlight. "Windows look good," Blake said as he turned the corner
of the house into the backyard "They got a glass sliding door in their
back as well, but this one is intact."
"Uh huh," John said
while keeping his eyes glued to the tracker. It kept pointing him to the house,
so he knew the dog, or at least its tracker, was inside. Blake finished looking
over the back of the house and moved onto the other side. "It's getting
dark real fast," John said as he looked up to the oncoming night. Blake
ignored him as he moved towards some bushes on the side of the house and pushed
them aside to reveal a basement window, broken and blood stained. "Then
let's get inside quick before it gets too dark," he said with a smirk.
John panned over the window
with his flashlight. "Neither one of us are fitting through that window
unscathed," he said as he looked over all the blood. "Yeah,"
Blake agreed "I guess we'll have to break in." He then made for the
front door, looking for his lock pick tools as he ran. "Oh joy," John
said sarcastically to himself as he slowly followed. When he arrived, Blake was
already hunched over the door, working his tools.
"I feel inclined to
remind you that we are partaking in criminal activity within shouting distance
of an active crime scene," John said "A scene which has had no fewer
than a dozen cops inside all day with many more constantly coming and going.
Increased surveillance throughout the neighborhood would be something to expect
as well."
"So what you're saying is
I should work faster?" Blake asked.
"Not my first
thought," John said "But that works too."
"Easy," Blake
assured "I've been practicing."
"Like the time you locked
us out of the apartment?"
"I was gonna say like the
time I eventually got us back inside."
"After a weekend had gone
by."
"Whatever."
"A Labor Day
weekend."
"Just be glad the people
here didn't have a deadbolt. Then we'd really have a problem."
An encouraging click sounded
from Blake's efforts as he smiled and withdrew his tools. "After
you," he said as he turned the knob and pushed the door open.
"Why?" John asked "Because you expect something to attack in
there?" Blake nodded "Yes," he said "Also because you're
the guy with the gun. So if you do get attacked, feel free to shoot it."
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