NaNoWriMo 2021

 [Posted by Ted H]

 And the hopeless struggle returns for yet another go!

This year I'm bringing in the always reliable James Blake for another paranormal bloodbath called "Blood Friar" details to follow as the story gets written. I'm raring to go to get this beast started.

Just for fun, with there being a bunch of Blake stories, here's a fun timeline...

-[unpublished backstory that gets talked over in Demons Ascension]
-That One Night [Not a Blake story, but takes place in the universe]
-Demons Ascension
-Witches Shadow
-Pure Human
-Vampires of Pittsburgh
-Blood Friar

I bring that up because while Vampires of Pittsburgh is unfinished, certain characters and organizations are introduced in that story that will become reoccurring in Blood Friar. Not major players, but they'll be referenced.

The 2021 MLB Turtle-Wax Awards

[Posted by Ted H]

Well that was quite a vacation. Don't worry, NaNoWriMo is coming.


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[The 2021 MLB Turtle-Wax Awards]

These are the awards you DON'T want to win.



The "Orioles Would Rather Play In This Division" Award
Awarded to the crappiest division in baseball
[Previous winners: 2009 AL Central, 2010 AL West, 2011 AL Central, 2012 AL Central, 2013 AL West, 2014 NL East, 2015 NL East, 2016 AL Central, 2017 NL East, 2018 AL Central, 2019 AL Central]


---The National League East: Braves, Mets, Phillies, Marlins, Nationals---

 
In a year where the Dodgers win 106 games and have to settle for the wild card, it seems criminal that a team can win just 88 games and not only win a division but also not have to play the best team in the league in the Division Series. The Braves won their division while both NL wild card teams had better records. Meanwhile in the AL, the Blue Jays and Mariners missed the playoffs entirely yet would have easily displaced the Braves.

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The "Steroid Accusation Rookie of The Year" Award
Awarded to the slugger who is probably gonna get accused of steroids next, if not already
(I am NOT accusing the winner of steroids, just sayin...)
[Previous winners: 2009 Aaron Hill (TOR), 2010 Corey Hart (MIL), 2011 Jacoby Ellsbury (BOS), 2012 Edwin Encarnacion (TOR), 2013 Chris Davis (BAL), 2014 Victor Martinez (DET), 2015 Nolan Arenado (COL), 2016 Brian Dozier (MIN), 2017 Justin Smoak (TOR), 2018 Christian Yelich (MIL), 2019 Baseballs]


---Award Cancelled---

MLB keeps messing with the baseballs so now anyone can go deep it seems. After 2019’s award, it seemed fitting to call it.

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The "What the Hell Happened to You?" Award
Awarded to the team that fell off the map when they were supposed to be contenders
[Previous winners: 2009 New York Mets, 2010 Seattle Mariners, 2011 Cincinnati Reds, 2012 Miami Marlins, 2013 California Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, 2014 Milwaukee Brewers, 2015 Seattle Mariners, 2016 Kansas City Royals, 2017 New York Mets, 2018 Washington Nationals, 2019 Boston Red Sox]


---Los Angeles Angels---


I am so sick of hearing about “Just! How! Amazing!” Mike Trout and Shohei Ohtani are...but then they once again can’t even sniff the postseason. Every season I have to hear about how this team supposedly made strides and will compete for at least a wild card slot. I will continue to make fun of this crappy franchise/players until they finally see October. Ohtani will probably be hurt (again) by then and Trout will stink up the joint (like the only other time he made the playoffs in his career) but for the love of God, if you’re gonna shower those two bums with undue praise, at least have them lead this sorry team to the playoffs one time. Does MLB have to introduce an even more bloated playoff format to finally get this team in?

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The "Shut Your God Damn Mouth" Award
Awarded to whoever talked too much without backing it up
[Previous winners: 2009 Chicago Cubs, 2010 MLB Network, 2011 Carlos Zambrano (CHC), 2012 Boston Red Sox, 2013 Jordany Valdespin (NYM), 2014 Keith Olberman (ESPN), 2015 Boston Red Sox, 2016 Boston Red Sox fans, 2017 Yasiel Puig (LAD), 2018 San Francisco Giants, 2019 Brodie Van Wagenen (NYM), 2020 Houston Astros]


---The New York Mets---


I know you’re in New York and you’ve got the Yankees to compete with, but let’s not try to bad mouth the few fans in the city you already have. OK guys? At this rate even the ones that come to boo you won’t show up and then Citi Field will be as empty as every Rays home game.

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The "This Years Miracle, Next Years Indians" Award
Awarded to the team that made a surprise playoff run this year, and will fall short next year
[Previous winners: 2009 Colorado Rockies, 2010 Tampa Bay Rays, 2011 Tampa Bay Rays, 2012 Baltimore Orioles, 2013 Cleveland Indians, 2014 Kansas City Royals, 2015 Houston Astros, 2016 Cleveland Indians, 2017 Minnesota Twins, 2018 Oakland Athletics, 2019 St Louis Cardinals]


---San Francisco Giants---


Out of nowhere the Giants came by storm and took home the leagues best record and the NL West. Sure, it all fell apart in a thrilling NLDS, but that doesn’t mean the Giants aren’t for real going forward, right?

Yes, that’s exactly what it means. They might compete next year, sure, but not nearly at this level. They wildly outperformed expectations this season and they’ll regress to the mean next year.

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The "This Years Phillies, Next Years Miracle" Award
Awarded to a team that sucked this year, but can make a run next year
[Previous winners: 2009 Chicago White Sox, 2010 Chicago White Sox, 2011 Washington Nationals, 2012 Seattle Mariners, 2013 New York Yankees, 2014 Chicago Cubs, 2015 Detroit Tigers, 2016 New York Yankees, 2017 San Francisco Giants, 2018 Philadelphia Phillies, 2019 Toronto Blue Jays]


---The Cincinnati Reds---


More or less a nonfactor this year, Cincy made strides quietly and are poised to make a run of a not so closed off NL Central. The Cardinals needed a legendary winning streak to make the final playoff spot this year, so one or two appropriate additions can put the Reds into contention for sure next season.

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The "AAA Team In Disguise" Award
Awarded to a team that might have better luck in AAA
[Previous winners: 2009 Washington Nationals, 2010 Pittsburgh Pirates, 2011 Boston Red Sox, 2012 Houston Astros, 2013 Miami Marlins, 2014 Texas Rangers, 2015 Philadelphia Phillies, 2016 Minnesota Twins, 2017 Detroit Tigers, 2018 Miami Marlins, 2019 Detroit Tigers, 2020 Pittsburgh Pirates]


---The Pittsburgh Pirates---


Yes, some teams lost more this season, but while the Diamondbacks had to contend in a division with two different 105+ win teams and the Orioles had to deal with FOUR playoff caliber teams, the Pirates were just lousy. And for reasons that’ll be highlighted soon, they lack basic fundamentals. Pirates baseball is going nowhere fast...

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The "Dull Knife in the Drawer" Award
Awarded to the biggest mental error this year
[Previous winners: 2009 Washington Nati(o)nals, 2010 Barak Obama, 2011 Brian Sabean (SF), 2012 Derek Norris (OAK), 2013 Mark Pagnozzi (HOU), 2014 Michael Pineda (NYY), 2015 Arte Moreno (LAA), 2016 Buster Posey (SFG), David Price (BOS), 2018 Gary Sanchez (NYY), 2019 Brandon Drury/Teoscar Hernandez (TOR), 2020 Jo Adell (LAA)]


---The Entire Pittsburgh Pirates Defense---


Oh Lord, this play will go down in history. Pittsburgh based “Urinating Tree” puts it perfectly here.
Matt Antonelli puts it a bit more eloquently.

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The "Results May Vary" Award
Awarded to a player/team that didn't live up to the hype
[Previous winners: 2010 Stephen Strasburg (WAS), 2011 Carl Crawford (BOS), 2012 Los Angeles Dodgers, 2013 Toronto Blue Jays, 2014 Boston Red Sox, 2015 Robinson Cano (SEA), 2016 San Diego Padres, 2017 Eric Thames (MIL), 2018 Shohei Ohtani (LAA), 2019 Bryce Harper (PHI), 2020 Mike Trout (LAA)]


---Every Pitcher in Baseball---


So, baseball has a “sticky stuff” issue when it comes to its pitchers. As elaborated before, a bit of the sticky stuff to help command and keep fastballs from going errant into a batters head isn’t a horrible thing. But baseball outright banned the stuff and suddenly we’re back to a previous issue. Now all pitchers seem to be lacking a bit and hitters are enjoying a field day at the plate. Remember when home runs were getting out of hand and you swore it had nothing to do with how the baseballs were made?

It seemed like a nice little compromise. Let pitchers cheat just a little so no one has to admit that the balls are doctored in favor of home runs and more offense. But now that you won’t let pitchers have their slight edge, what can be done about the rampant home run gluttony that follows that you tried to explain away last time? Just fix the damn baseballs already!

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The "Ozzie Kind of Crazy" Award
Awarded to the manager who had the most entertaining season to watch
[Previous winners: 2012 Bobby Valentine (BOS), 2013 Joe Girardi (NYY), 2014 Kirk Gibson (ARI), Matt Williams (WAS), Joe Girardi (NYY), Brad Ausmus (DET), Kevin Cash (TB)]


---Aaron Boone of the New York Yankees---


Managing in the Bronx used to come with a volatile owner with a short fuse for field managers, so Boone might be shocked to find that he’s the first Yankees manager in a long time to hang around long enough for the fans to get tired of his act long before management apparently. The fans loved Torre (winning 5 titles will do that) and while Girardi had his critics, he also had his supporters (and a title of his own) Boone has no titles and many fans already assume he doesn’t even make decisions on his own. The entertainment that comes with Boone is merely in watching him try to justify decision that clearly aren’t his own in regards to players he’s partially afraid to criticize otherwise.

George Steinbrenner would have long ago fired Boone and traded away half of those analytics darling players.

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The "Go Stand in the Corner!" Award
Awarded to the most standout suspension of the season
[Previous winners: 2013 Ryan Braun (MIL), 2014 Alex Rodriguez (NYY), 2015 Jonathan Papelbon (WAS), 2016 Rougned Odor (TEX), 2017 Austin Romine (NYY), 2018 Ken Giles (HOU), 2019 Clint Fraizer (NYY), 2020 Joe Kelly (LAD)]


---Anyone Suspended from the Coronavirus Rule---


Crime: Stepping onto the field and potentially getting someone sick with a virus that has a >99% survive rate
Time: Wait, what?


I guess brawls are a bad look for baseball, but the fans love it. But MLB announced that there would be penalties for players who enter the field during certain altercations...I guess that’s to limit the spread, but it’s stupid. These are the same people stepping onto the field during the game anyway. It makes no sense, but then again, no rules created for the WuFlu make any sense.

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The "Just Retire Already!" Award
Awarded to the player on the wrong side of their prime
[Previous winner: 2015 Bartolo Colon (NYM), 2016 Alex Rodriguez (FA), 2017 Bartolo Colon (MIN), 2018 Felix Hernandez (SEA), 2019 Chris Davis (BAL)]


---Justin Verlander of the Houston Astros---


Tommy John Surgery ruined any hope of 2021 for the 38 year old starter. Some guys come back from Tommy John...but Verlander isn’t quite young enough to redefine his pitching style. And he still hasn’t ruled out hanging up his cleats. TJ takes roughly a year just to get back on a mound, let alone pitch with authority.

Little Ghost - Mall Watching

[Posted by Ted H]

New day job brings crazy hours. That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it.

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[Little Ghost - Mall Watching]

They never found the right guy, and Starbucks was slow that morning, so they ended up at the mall sooner than they thought and watched the old people doing their laps before the stores opened. They sat on one of the benches by an exit where the elderly shuffled their way passed. There they remained, at times talking about random things of no consequence, other times remaining silent, and other times going into elaborate anecdotes from their lives whenever someone walked by that reminded them of something interesting.

Sometimes someone would wander by to sit on their bench, and they’d oblige even if the person wouldn’t be affected by them remaining. They’d make a game out of having a one-sided conversation with the people sitting on their bench until they finally left for one reason or another. They stayed until the sun set and darkness reigned outside once more, finally leaving when the mall stores began to close up and there were no more mall goers to watch and comment on. Kristina found the whole day cathartic. She had a chance to decompress her mind from everything that had transpired onto her in the last 24 hours.

As they walked through the Saturday night streets, and the late-night college student crowd as they bar hopped, Kristina let Ricky lead her in the direction she felt the fallout shelter was. “Were you scared?” she asked when they finally got away from the crowds. Ricky was in the middle of some thought when he looked to Kristina and apologized for not hearing her.

“When you died. Were you scared?” she asked again “I was terrified as it happened.”

“I was lucky,” Ricky said “I was high as hell so I didn’t realize I was dead. At first, I thought I was having an out of body experience. I mean don’t get me wrong, I was freaking out after the fact, but I guess I was lucky that I wasn’t aware of my death until it had already happened. How are you feeling now that you’ve had a day as one of us?”

Kristina paused a moment. “There’s no getting used to this, is there?

“Yeah,” Ricky said with a smile “What we are, it ain’t natural. That's what someone told me when I was in your shoes.”

Little Ghost - We're All Bad Guys

[Posted by Ted H]

My little side project has become as obsessive as it's name suggests. Don't worry, I haven't forgotten about my first obsession...

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[Little Ghost - We're All Bad Guys]

“Oh, well, I was just curious,” Kristina said, not looking to verify that there was indeed someone that stupid that they’d reject going to Heaven. Her plan now was so stop talking and avoid attention, perhaps get Jamal and Mike to start arguing again, anything if it meant avoiding scrutiny. Her hopes were short lived, however.

“So,” Cheryl said as she clasped her hands together and rested her face against them “What was it that clinched your fate?”

“Hmm?” Kristina hummed, unsure what the question was.

“Your unspeakable sin,” Cheryl elaborated “Your irredeemable crime. What action did you do that was so heinous that it merited instant rejection from the pearly gates?”

“Oh, well...” Kristina trailed off. If she could sweat, she figured it would be pouring down in buckets right now. She wondered how effective she could play dumb to these people, or if it were easier to lie outright. What could she think of on the spot?

“What makes you think I’ve done anything wrong in life?” she blurted out “I’m innocent, I swear,” she forced a smile for effect, getting a laugh from Sammy, but not satisfying Cheryl. The woman shrugged one shoulder and kept her eyes on Kristina. Did she know? Was Kristina making it too obvious? Was the joke a bad idea and now they’ll see right through her?

“Oh, don’t be embarrassed,” Ricky assured her “We’re all bad guys here!”

Little Ghost - Orientation

 [Posted by Ted H]

Situations at my day job have kinda taken center stage, but I'll still try to churn out some updates here...I've got some backlog remaining for LG before I have to worry about writing new stuff, though I'd love to sit down one of these nights and power out something...

Help might be on the way in the near future though...stand by...

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[Little Ghost - Orientation]


“Kristina!” Clifford called from the back. The other ghosts occupied themselves in their conversation while Kristina approached Bill and Clifford. “Don’t freak out,” Clifford said “We’re all safe here.” Kristina nodded slowly, not sure what was happening. “This is Bill,” Clifford continued “He’s a Reaper.”

“In a room full of ghosts? Are you sure?” Kristina said.

“Yeah,” Bill said “Not all Reapers are the same. I’m a regular kind. The scary kind the others are talking about are known as Hunter Reapers, or Predator Reapers. It depends on where you are. Some regions have their own variation for the title.”

“I don’t understand. What’s the difference?”

“You’ll know a Hunter when you see one. Trust me.”

“This is a lot to take in.”

“We figured,” Clifford said “It’s time we give you a proper orientation.”

“Well, I got my new name figured out, apparently. Is that part of my orientation?”

“Meh, I guess,” Clifford said “But let’s start simple. You are a ghost, officially known as a runaway.”

“Oh God, there’s classifications of ghosts too?”

“Sure. Three types. Temps, Waiting and Runaways,” Clifford explained “Temps are ghosts just long enough to find out they're dead. Then a Reaper will send them off to their final reward.”


“Like a ray of light in the sky taking you to Heaven?” Kristina asked, a sickening sense of dread surrounding her.

Little Ghost - Kristina Car Crash

[Posted by Ted H]

Either I neglected it for the last few years, or I did it and forgot all about it, but last week I make sure to get the "Pure Human" collection post set up and added it to the header with the other complete works.

Also, this makes 4 updates in 2021, already halfway to what I was able to accomplish all of last year. Seems that my new years resolution is working out...

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[Little Ghost - Kristina Car Crash]

They entered the back yard of a one-story ranch house. It was a small yard with a garden in the corner and a blacktop half court with a basketball hoop on the far side. The trio stopped short of the court. “Just so you know, there’s a stairway of sorts here,” Clifford said “Just because you don’t see it doesn’t mean you won’t drop down when you reach it.”


Kristina gave a small laugh. “Oh, don’t worry,” she said “I’m aware of a whole bunch of rules that I can’t understand!” Clifford pondered what she just said, then gave up after a few seconds and shook his head. “Let’s have mister expert over here go first,” he said as he referenced a smiling Sammy. “Sure,” Sammy said as he stepped forward “We wouldn’t want anyone to fall and break their leg.”


“That was the first time, and you lied to me where the drop was,” Clifford chided.


“It’s still freakin hilarious when a ghost cries out ‘Oh God I’ll break my leg!’ as he flails his arms in the air!” Sammy said with a laugh.


“So, what staircase?” Kristina finally asked.


“Just watch, honey,” Sammy said as he walked a few feet onto the court, then began descending into the pavement as if he were traversing stairs. “Right this way,” Clifford said as he followed. Kristina stuck close as Clifford disappeared into the basketball court. She lightly put her foot where both men began to drop and found her foot went right through like the court was merely an illusion. She crept her way down until only her head remained above ground.

Pure Human

Pure Human
by: Ted H

James Blake and his partner head to Albany to investigate the scene of a grisly attack on a family. Blake must find the paranormal origin to the creatures that slay in the night before the world is overrun with more. But with the signs of the origin all pointing away from the supernatural, just where does the line between human and monster lie?

-2015 National Novel Writing Month Winner

Ungodly Hour

Illusion Breaker

Look Into It

Day Drinking

Dream

Ninja

To Albany

Time Stop

Eating

Magdalena

She Must Work Out

It Came in Through the Woods

When You Dream

Reaper at Work

Nurse Gossip

Dog Hunt

I Think I Found Fido

Embrace Eternity

Breakfast at Anin's

Apples

Common Sense

Charming

Clyde vs Whitey

Who Dat Is?

Couples Counseling

Big Men on Campus

Impure

Dr. Watterson

The Melrose Theory

Attempted Arson

Shadow Caster

Pecking Order

Dead on a Mountain

Doing a Thing

To the Gas Station

Born from Nightmares

Go Time

Trick Plays

One Problem at a Time

Let Me In

Be Gone

Ethics and Morals

Closure